Bath Time

Bath time can happen at any time of the day, and is a great way to bond with your precious little one. 

You can use bath time as a way to calm down your baby at night, so they can sleep better. Parents worldwide use it as a way for their baby to sleep through the night (both them and their baby). So, as long as your little one enjoys it, make sure to do it as often as possible (daily is even better, since his/her body needs the moisture.

From the moment your little angel is in your tummy, he/she can swim. There's no question on whether a baby can swim from birth, as it is well known that they can. They can automatically swim (in their own way) and there's zero fear of drowning (which is a fear many new mothers share).

When I put Victoria in her bathtub (a bathtub for babies which you can find in almost any baby store), she began to "swim" right away. She waved her arms and legs, closed her eyes and dove backwards into the water. Sure, she was scared (and still is, all babies are) but I let her hold on to me and she enjoys every minute of it.

I can't wait for my baby girl to be able to sit on her own, so she can play with her toys!

Someone To Rely On

It's of great importance to have somebody you can really rely on. That special someone you can rely on when you are tired of parenthood and need a break (which we all do at some point, don't lie to yourself). Parenthood is a full-time job with a lot of downs (as well as ups), which makes us want to get away for a while.

And that's when you need that special someone, your right hook, to help you out. To take care of the child, and even keep it with them for the night. It should definitely be done as a favor, and your right hook shouldn't ask for something in return. 'Cause if he/she does ask for something in return, then they don't understand you and they can't be trusted ever again (my opinion of course).

For example, if you are going to a bar and meeting an old friend. You can ask your right hook if they can take care of your child on that specific day and let them know when you will be picking up your child (in some cases it might be a day or, in some others, it might be a few hours). According to what they respond with, you may take your action. Make sure it doesn't form any kind of inconvenience for them, as you don't want to be a burden. Once the plans have been made, you can go ahead and have fun without stressing yourself when you are out having fun.

Here's the most important tip on how not to stress yourself when you are having fun:

Photo Check Up
Ask your helper (person taking care of your child) to send you regular photos so you don't stress about what it happening every single hour. It can either be every hour or every second hour (that's up to you to decide). Make sure you inform your helper of this decision. There shouldn't be an argument on their part, as it is your child and this way you show that you care (which is natural). If needed, let them know why you need this reassurance. This way you can also keep your eye off your phone when you are out having fun/having your time-off!

NOW GO AND DON'T STRESS YOURSELF TOO MUCH! AS LONG AS YOU HAVE SOMEONE TO RELY ON, YOU CAN HAVE YOUR FUN AS WELL AS BE A PARENT!

Importance of a Driver's License

Some people live with the belief that a driver's license isn't as important in a parent's life. But I have to disagree with you there.

Fact of the matter is, that if you want to give your child a plentiful life (full of adventure and travel), a driver's license is of importance. You can drive with your child to the doctor's, or go on a nice little field trip near by, or even to a country/county fair in your area!

You save money and time driving with public transport. But of course, you have to save up for money for gas/power for your car (which is the only negative aspect of a car).

Many positive aspects against one negative! So, why think more about it? Sure, it's expensive to get the driver's license to begin with. But the positive aspects are HUGE!

You're Allowed To Get Tired

You're allowed to get tired! We have feelings and emotions which continue to evolve even after birth (and let's not talk about during pregnancy, right?). Hormones play a big role for us mothers, both during pregnancy and up to 6 months after birth.

Our bodies are still processing the new hormone levels, which exceed every imagination we had during pregnancy. After birth, our hormones play a trampoline in our bodies. You may feel depressive one minute, happy the next and angry the next. It's not your psychology's fault, it's your hormones. You are still getting used to everything after all.

Late nights are a huge test for us, which usually take place during the first 2 to 3 months of our precious little ones' lives. It's either colic, sleep, hunger, or discomfort which makes your baby's life so hard. And together with your baby's life, your life gets harder as well.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that life with a baby is only hard. But there are difficulties and we have to keep it in mind. Nothing is as easy as it seems! We only have the love in our hearts which push us forward to make our babies as happy as possible!

Our baby's smile is the most important thing in the world! That's how we know we are doing a good job! So keep going! And when you see that smile, you will know what I'm talking about!

Bedtime

Always an important time in a parent's life (finally time for some me-time). But it's not always easy to put your loved one to sleep, is it? It's not always easy for me either: sometimes Victoria just doesn't want to! And that's okay (for me anyway), as long as it's only for a few more hours and not the whole night. If she exceeds my time frame of an extra 2-hour-awake-time, then I turn to my secret weapons:

Secret Weapon #1: Chamomile Tea
It is well know that Chamomile tea has some kind of soothing magical power. Even for us adults! So if it works for us adults (who are bigger than a baby), imagine what it could do for our little angels!

Secret Weapon #2: Bedtime Story
A bedtime story might always work (might being a keyword here, as every baby is different), but you should be careful of HOW you read it to your baby boy/girl. The tone of your voice plays a key role in putting you little one to sleep (but more about the tone of voice below). The most important thing to remember is not to show your baby the pictures or get them involved in any way! If the baby gets involved, he/she will get stimulated and his/her brain will go on full-working mode. We don't want that if we want our baby to sleep.

Secret Weapon #3: Tone of Voice
Always keep your tone of voice around your baby as quiet as possible. Speak as softly as you can to them, even when reading a bedtime story. If you need to communicate with your partner or other member of the family within the same room as your sleepy/sleeping baby, please do so in a whisper. This way, your baby's brain will continue working in sleep mode.

Secret Weapon #4: Don't Stimulate Your Baby
Most important thing to remember is that you cannot allow yourself to stimulate the baby if you wish to put him/her to sleep. Any kind of playfulness has to immediately be put to a stop as soon as you decide to put your baby to sleep. Otherwise, you can kiss sleepy-time bye bye, my friends.

Reading Books To Your Precious Little One(s)

Whether it be a bedside story or just a bonding time, reading a book can be a great way to spend some quality time with each other. I try to read to my little princess as much as I can, "try" being the keyword.

Some babies are scared of books. Sounds dumb, right? Well, in their little minds, books can be quite scary... Therefore, I took the liberty of writing a few tips that could possibly help you (as parents) out:

Tip #1: Show your baby that the book won't hurt him/her

It's always the pictures! We don't understand it, since we can't exactly know what a baby might or might not be thinking (wouldn't that be nice, right?). You have to show your baby that the pictures won't hurt him/her.
You can do that by pointing to be pictures and explaining to your baby what each picture is, or what is happening, in a calm and relaxed voice. For example, when you see a forest with many flowers, say something like "See all the tall trees (point at the different trees) and the beautiful flowers (point at the flowers). Aren't they beautiful/nice?" This way, your baby will learn what each picture is and be less scared of them.

Tip #2: Create Your Own Story

Chose a book with nice pictures and let your creativity take over. Make a story up as you go, but make sure that it's either a fun one (if it's bonding time) or a relaxing one (if it's bedtime). The best thing to do is to chose a book which you know, so that you don't always have to check the book before making the story up.

Overall, make sure you have fun! Whether it's bonding time or bedtime, your baby will have the time of his/her life! You will be with them all the way!

A Lot of Involvements (For Both Mamas & Papas)

A lot of people will try and get involved in how you raise your child, and sometimes through all the pressure they will succeed because you will just give up trying to prove them otherwise. But don't give up!

Take it from me. Both my mother and my grandfather try to "explain" how difficult it is to be a single mother. That I'm not a single mother as long as I ask for help and I can't understand the difficulties since they are so involved. That I should try it all alone for a few days so I can see how difficult it is. But I never said it was easy!

Being a single parent (whether father or mother) is one of the hardest jobs that anyone can do. But we do it with a smile on our face because we know that deep down our children love us for it. Deep down they are thankful and they see us as their heroes. And in the end, they will thank us in their own way.

Let's be honest here for a minute: We signed up for it! To be parents I mean. Whether single or taken, partnered up or married. We signed up for the hard times and the easy times. But no one is ever prepared for the difficulties. You can't expect to know everything! We all learn new things as we go on in life!

Don't get me wrong! Asking for help is always good! You should definitely ask for help if you need it! Someone to watch your child if you have an appointment, someone to watch your child if you need a night off (we all need a night off, don't you dare tell me you don't, you will be lying!), even if it is for just a few hours so you can go on a walk to clear your head, or have some private time with your spouse/partner.

Ask for help, and when they say "yes", or "sure, no problem", they're doing it at their own free will and they should NOT be expecting something in return. They lose the right to say "Since I helped you, you have to do something in return". No! They immediately lose my respect when they do that to me! Whether it's family or a friend, they lose my respect and I never ask them for anything ever again! Period! 

YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF THE PROGRESS YOU'RE MAKING, WITH OR WITHOUT ANY HELP! GOOD JOB MAMMA/PAPA! KEEP IT UP!

How It All Began

7. March, 2023       16:43PM

At only 3148g, Victoria-Alison was finally here! At a full-body length of 50cm and a head circumference of 34.5cm, baby girl was in my arms after a wait of 39 weeks and 1 day.

She was born with a head full of dark brown hair (which will change as she grows) and tan skin. I really hope that her skin won't change as much as her hair will. Her eyebrows have a light brown color, which means that her hair will take the same color as she grows.

Her face was worth the 18 hours of labor I endured. It was worth the pain, and it was definitely worth the tears I shed. Everyone describes labor as a painful experience, a time when you bring a little person in this world and immediately gain the responsibility of a tiny human being. I won't try and change your mind, but I will tell you one thing: Nobody tells you of how amazing it's going to be in the long run!

And that's why I'm here. I'm here to share the good and bad days, the milestones, the laughter and the tears. But most of all, I'm here to tell other new single mothers out there one thing:

YOU ARE ENOUGH! YOU ARE ENOUGH FOR THE LITTLE PERSON YOU HAVE DECIDED TO INTRODUCE THIS WORLD TO! YOU ARE A STRONG, INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO CAN MAKE ANYTHING HAPPEN! AND I, ALONG WITH OTHER SINGLE MAMMAS OUT THERE, AM PROUD OF YOU QUEEN!